Skookum... Scrumptious... Butteryumptious!

      If you haven't met me in real life, or haven't known me for long then you don't know that my mom (and occasionally myself) makes the most skookum scrumptious butyraceous cinnamon rolls in all cinnamon roll history (and yes, those are all real words...)! 
      I want to *gasp* give you the recipe, for two reasons. First, it's not our recipe, and second, THE WORLD SHOULD MEET THESE TO DIE FOR CINNAMON ROLLS, and third, because I thought of a third, I can't eat any sugar, or gluten, or dairy, or yeast, for SIX weeks. I might as well torture myself while making everyone else drool along with me. By the way, did I mention this is a guaranteed success recipe?!  
      Also, most of you probably, maybe, I dearly hope, know the Pioneer Woman, cause her food is fantastiiiiccc. If you don't know who she is, hopefully you'll be motivated to learn more by the end of this post. This recipe seems long, but in reality it's just simple, easy steps that take time.
Here is the recipe:

BEST CINNAMON ROLLS EVER

Prep time: 2hrs Cook time: 30mins Servings: 8 

(Do it once, get familiar, then do triple and quadruple batches!!!)

Ingredients:

1 quart Whole Milk

1 cup Vegetable Oil

1 cup Sugar

2 packages Active Dry Yeast, 0.25 Ounce Packets

8 cups (Plus 1 Cup Extra, Reserved) All-purpose Flour

1 teaspoon (heaping) Baking Powder

1 teaspoon (scant) Baking Soda

1 Tablespoon (heaping) Salt

 Plenty Of Melted Butter

2 cups Sugar

 Generous Sprinkling Of Cinnamon

 MAPLE FROSTING:

1 bag Powdered Sugar

2 teaspoons Maple Flavoring

1/2 cup Milk

1/4 cup Melted Butter

1/4 cup Brewed Coffee

1/8 teaspoon Salt

This blank spot right here ^^^ I promise I'm not trying to hid an ingredient from you. Nothing's there.

Instructions:

For the dough, heat the milk, vegetable oil, and sugar in a medium saucepan over medium heat to just below a boil. Set aside and cool to warm. Sprinkle the yeast on top and let it sit on the milk for one minute. Add 8 cups of the flour. Stir until just combined, then cover with a clean kitchen towel, and set aside in a relatively warm place for 1 hour. After 1 hour, remove the towel and add the baking powder, baking soda, salt, and the remaining 1 cup flour. Stir thoroughly to combine. Use the dough right away, or place in a mixing bowl and refrigerate for up to 3 days, punching down the dough if it rises to the top of the bowl. (Note: dough is easier to work with if it’s been chilled for at least an hour or so beforehand.)

Preheat the oven to 375°F.

To assemble the rolls, remove half the dough from the pan/bowl. On a floured baking surface, roll the dough into a large rectangle, about 30 x 10 inches. The dough should be rolled very thin.

To make the filling, pour 3/4 cup to 1 cup of the melted butter over the surface of the dough. Use your fingers to spread the butter evenly. Generously sprinkle half of the ground cinnamon and 1 cup of the sugar over the butter. Don’t be afraid to drizzle on more butter or more sugar! Gooey is the goal.

Now, beginning at the end farthest from you, roll the rectangle tightly towards you. Use both hands and work slowly, being careful to keep the roll tight. Don’t worry if the filling oozes as you work; that just means the rolls are going to be divine. When you reach the end, pinch the seam together and flip the roll so that the seam is face down. When you’re finished, you’ll wind up with one long buttery, cinnamony, sugary, gooey log.

Slip a cutting board underneath the roll and with a sharp knife, make 1/2-inch slices. One “log “will produce 20 to 25 rolls. Pour a couple of teaspoons of melted butter into disposable foil cake pans and swirl to coat. Place the sliced rolls in the pans, being careful not to overcrowd. (Each pan will hold 7 to 9 rolls.)

Repeat the rolling/sugar/butter process with the other half of the dough and more pans. Preheat the oven to 375°F. Cover all the pans with a kitchen towel and set aside to rise on the countertop for at least 20 minutes before baking. Remove the towel and bake for 15 to 18 minutes, until golden brown. Don’t allow the rolls to become overly brown.

While the rolls are baking, make the maple icing: In a large bowl, whisk together the powdered sugar, milk, butter, coffee, and salt. Splash in the maple flavoring. Whisk until very smooth. Taste and add in more maple, sugar, butter, or other ingredients as needed until the icing reaches the desired consistency. The icing should be somewhat thick but still very pourable.

Remove pans from the oven. Immediately drizzle icing over the top. Be sure to get it all around the edges and over the top. As they sit, the rolls will absorb some of the icing’s moisture and flavor. They only get better with time… not that they last for more than a few seconds.

Make them for a friend today! It’ll seal the relationship for life. I promise.

If you're a picture person like me (what is the consistency supposed to look like???) here's the link: The Actual Place With the Recipe

I'll repeat, this recipe is from The Pioneer  Woman, otherwise known as Ree Drummond. 

I also recommend looking up a really (insert what you like here; is there such a thing as a healthy?) cream cheese frosting recipe to use instead of the maple. Or try both.

Enjoy~